When my parents asked what color I wanted to paint my room I answered red and black. And now my room is Lavender and Grape. Need I say more?
We're not even done with the damn thing yet. Still 1 wall and about half of another. Sunday my wood flooring is going down and I think monday my new furniture is coming. I can't wait...*sigh*
I had to paint my own closet. When I was cutting really bad, I used to sit in my closet and cut my wrists, thighs, arms,ankles etc and then drag my wounds across my walls. So they were a bloody mess. And I painted over it. I painted over my red past.
My dad went hysterical and screamed a few nights. He's right tho. This room make over is a hassle. But it wasn't my damn idea. I didn't even want to paint! Its not like I won't wall paper it with posters after we're done anyway.
I haven't purged in months. Cut in..I dunno weeks? I cut my ankle bad awhile ago, and my thigh. I've been restricting my eating. Skipping meals. The usual. I haven't weighed myself in the longest time. But I can still see my ribs. I love standing sideways in front of the mirror. Sigh. It makes me feel thin.
I saw the movie Antoine Fisher last weekend. His relationship with his counselor reminded me of mine with Mr. greene. God am I co-dependant or what?
I watched "Don't Say a Word" this morning. God I love that movie. I want to be put in a mental institution like that. Or maybe the one in "Girl Interrupted". Has anyone else noticed that Brittany Murphy is in a mental institution in a few movies?? Its a conspiracy.